1.
Intro I Still Say That Regret Instruction Manual Issue 2 Was My Best Album and I Wish It Wasn't So Overlooked
1:19
2.
And If I Had No Real Job and No Mortgage Payment, Maybe I Could Also Sit Around Making Music All Day and Have a Release Every Other Month
3:21
3.
I've Really Lost It Because This Shit Is Starting to Sound Like a Washed-Up, Half-Assed Fatboy Slim Ripoff With a Twelve Year Old's Sense of Humor
1:50
4.
An Open Letter to Underground Music, Those Who Review It and Those Who Use It as a Symbol of Their Individuality
3:14
5.
I Will Make Up for a Lifetime of Fucking Chicks Poorly by Having the Most Diverse CD Collection in the World
1:56
6.
Pointing Out Your Elitist Superiority Complex Through Your Track Titles.
0:57
7.
To Clarify, the Only Thing I Gained From This Relationship Was 15 lbs.
3:21
8.
Legacy of Stretch Marks, The
3:07
9.
First Chance I Get I Am Licensing This Track to a Car Commercial or Video Game, So Fuck You and Your No Sell Out, Anti-Establishment Posturing, or Some Such in Your Face Remark of That Sort
3:16
10.
Making Songs About Drinking Is Something Very Original and I Think It Will Expand My Musical Horizons Since I Have Never Made One Before
2:29
11.
A Funny Sample and Bad Guitar Loop Do Not a Song Make
3:26
12.
Dear ________, Thank You for Attempting to Never Talk to Me Again Again
2:21
13.
Someday You Are Going to Have a Party, and I Will Make a Point to Come Poop All Over It So You Can Know How It Feels
2:36
14.
Please Don't Stand Behind Me and Make Those Stupid Noises With Your Mouth That You Seem to Think Indicate to Me That You Are Thinking
1:16
15.
Soundtrack for Nonexistant/Imaginary Midwest Underground Hardcore Electronic Scene
3:46
16.
Outro: Close Enough Only Counts in Horseshoes and My Music, and Could I Get Anymore Self Righteous
2:02